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On Devotion and One’s Motivation For It

Devotion is selfless affection and dedication for your partner. Liek the other keys to sustaining mutual love, devotion should always be reciprocal. Each partner’s state of mind should be to love the other without the expectation that they will be “rewarded.”

This statement may seem to come in direct conflict with the previous sentence about devotion being reciprocal, but therein lies the crux of my argument. While devotion should be freely felt and given by both partners, the expectation that one will recieve it cheapens the ideal.

Why does it cheapen it? When the expectations that one will recieve something for one’s devotion, it may become the sole or prominent reason that you give it. Consequently, one may start to demand a certain level of devotion, and should that level fall short of satisfaction, problems can ensue.

An interesting thing about devotion, is that when a man shows it in strength, other males sometimes mock it with claims of a lack of masculinity and control. While this is sometimes the case in those relationships that lack balance, other times it is truly those men in control of themselves that are able to fully and selflessly give to their mate. The men who truly believe the insults they spew often times do not understand the beauties of sacrifice and devotion as they relate to love. (Take the previous paragraph with a grain of salt, it is probably the most subjective of my statements so far.)

How can one express devotion for his partner? Be attentive to her needs and wants. Be thoughtful and kind and considerate. Always be respectful (this has previously been mentioned). Give time and affection freely and plentifully. These are all ways that one can express his love and dedication.

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The Tao of Love Part 3: On the Importance of Mutual Respect and Understanding