This used to be private, but I’m making it public. I hope no one minds!! byeeeeeeeeeee….

(Untitled) Part 2

He glanced at her through the corner of his eye. All he could catch was a bit of her leg. His head hung to the floor.

“When you said those things,” he started reluctantly, “I was shocked, but I understood. Then, I waited. You didn’t give me any sign that it was okay–that we were okay.”

“I used to think that no matter what–if we had our love for each other–and we were honest, that things would be okay. And …” his voice almost broke, “you didn’t let me know that it’d all be okay–that you still wanted me and wanted to be with me.”

She flashed into his mind–frozen memories of that night.

“I was looking into your eyes,” his voice started to shake, “and you just looked back. I kissed you softly to let you know I was sorry, but you just looked at me. I held you–you did hold me back–but it seemed too reluctant. Too forced.”

He started to sob as tears streaked down his cheeks, turning even farther from her as he hid himself in shame. “I wasn’t sure. I was so full of doubt. I needed you to tell me that you still cared for me. I waited and waited and kissed you softly again, and still…” he didn’t know what else to say as his voice trailed off. It seemed to him as if he had said everything that he needed to.

“The truth is,” he said–slowly, reluctantly, “after that, I felt lonely and worthless. Like I didn’t deserve you. I don’t want to blame you. You didn’t know. It’s just that…you should’ve. Mostly I blamed myself. I was so sorry I couldn’t be what you wanted me to be. I was sorry that I would never be able to change what had happened. I left you that night feeling less than a person.”

“It was something I couldn’t stand.”